Little thoughts sorting

Legends never die,  it is one big lie.

Should I build my own legend, or should i become a Shadow Sister of the Legend? Am I thinking too much about myself to say, that for some people I'm already legend?

Brother, now is mostly our Mum, who keeps your legend alive.

But how long she can do it, how long she can survive. One, maybe two decades? At the end of this year, she will be seventy-nine.

And what then? I inherite a lot from her, but not such drive in this direction.

What are my next goals in this space and time?
I wish to fullfill my husband dream that is to visit Durell's zoo, at least him, but better go there together (new cameras and big harddisk for photoes included); my pilgrimage in Japan and support and raise our son ... And after all this  in very far far end I wish sublimate in the rainbow ...
Yeah.

...

During this weekend i was lisening to talk with my schoolmate https://datatalk.buzzsprout.com/2034779/14642182

Interesting. Can you imagine how many people about my age and younger never saw at least dead mouse or hamster? 

The greates taboo of these days is talking about death.

Maybe because making friend with death can change ourself. One stops wasting own time. And sellers of entertaiment are loosing their obedient and addected clients.

A lot of people are most close to their dearest only after ones die, and they are going through their notes, photos and memories.

Who will go through my things?  Will be rainbow at the end or only ashes? 

I can't say, when our relationship switched from question 'Should I stay or should I go?' to question 'Who will die first?' But after my many failures it was unexpected change for me.